Top Ten Marco Rubio's Handwritten Notes to Donald Trump

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Top Ten Marco Rubio's Handwritten Notes to Donald Trump

Here's your Sharpie, sir
Sorry about that time I said your hands were small
You're my best friend but don't tell Pete coz he'll get mad
Sir—if there's a government shutdown, you can blame it on me :)
I swear I didn't tell anyone that you like Karoline
JD's a total dork—just sayin'. Can I be president after you?
Write back and fold this into a tiny square so no one sees
Please don't read this note aloud. Kristi won't stop picking on me
Meet me by the water fountain after 4th period. It's important
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Posted February 1, 2026

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This image of "fake note from Marco Rubio to Donald Trump" was created by Klugmeister.

Commentary

This top ten list is a funny riff on a handwritten note that Marco Rubio passed to Donald Trump during a January 9 meeting with oil company executives at the White House. Attempting to be subtle, Rubio suggested that Trump call on the Chevron CEO, who wanted to discuss something.

Alas, Trump read the private note aloud. Awkward!

So, we thought it would be fun to dream up some other handwritten notes that Rubio might pass to Trump during meetings. Themes for the notes include the embarrassing sucking-up behavior that is rife at Trump's televised cabinet meetings, Rubio's desire to curry Trump's favor, black Sharpies, etc. We also mixed in various silly missives that might be passed back and forth by middle schoolers. You may not think that's funny, but we do.

Hmm, we may be gaining accidental insights into the klugness site's low traffic statistics. We'll ask our VP of Marketing and Data Science to look into that, lol.

Oh, as long as we're muttering out loud: we apologize for the recent slowdown in our post-rate. You see, Klugmeister has recently been out trying to build an online presence on Medium. His latest effort is AI Pickup Lines That Inspire. That's one of a handful of stories he's recently written on Doctor Funny, a humor publication on Medium. Note most of the writers on Medium post behind a paywall so you won't be able to read unless you join Medium. Even so, you should be able to access the AI pickup line story using the "friends" link that I included above.

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In the Imagining Things blog, we've posted the third (and final) installment in a series of three blog posts about our eccentric webmaster's first motorcycle. This third blog post covers The Death of Klugmeister's Red Motorcycle. In this post, our webmaster describes an attempted trip to Key West that didn't work out so well. As he mulled this story lately, Klugmeister has been getting nostalgic about his li'l red Honda Rebel 250—though that's not the bike in the accompanying image, which was generated by AI. In other heartwarming news, our webmaster is continuing to make an effort to post new material to the Imagining Things blog on a more consistent basis.

Getting back to the funny top ten lists, we offer a couple of targeted subsets that focus on particular themes. For example, the Trump-Themed Lists are critical of President Trump, so you won't like them if you're a Trump aficionado.

Another theme is the clever May 2020 Now vs. Then series, which consists of 10 funny top ten lists that compare and contrast the initial coronavirus times to historical times in an amusing way (e.g., "stay at home" vs. "rock and roll all nite"). That early pandemic theme was created in 2000, but it feels sooo ancient! Based on viewership of these pages, it appears that most folks are loathe to revisit that challenging period, and we don't blame you!

Note that the themed lists are also included on the All Top Ten Lists archive (i.e., the themed lists are a subset of the full archive), so if you looked at the full archive, you won't find any new material on the themed lists. This handy bit of intell could free up more time for you to gaze at your phone, ponder the bruises on the back of Trump's hands, or try to get hard-to-find tickets to the Melania documentary.

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